"Sometimes at night, my thoughts...just turn to unpleasant things. Sad things. Regrets and fears and self doubt." She preferred making the tea, it gave her something to focus on so she didn't have to look at him as she admitted her emotional weaknesses. But she could admit them to him.

For god's sake, he'd already seen her at her worst, her most desperate and pathetic. There was little shame in admitting to unpleasant thoughts when the darkness closed in.

"It's worse some nights than others. Then I had an awful dream not too long ago, the nights have been worse since." She set out two prepared mugs and leaned against the counter as she waited for the water to boil.