envy_the_sinners | IC contact

I didn't ask for a psychoanalysis, I was just explaining that it's not personal. I know perfectly well what's wrong with me.

I wasn't speaking about you. At least while you aren't around the others.

It's like children on the schoolyard, that's all. We behave within the parameters of our peer group when actively in our peer group.

Except we aren't children. Did you even consider that you haven't heard from me because I don't want to deal with it?

We aren't children, no, but we're still new, in our ways. Newly human. I never expected you to contact me directly. If you don't want to deal with it, don't deal with it. I just wanted to make certain you were alright.

Except you have proven that you can be perfectly pleasant company. So I fail to see the point in the lot of you behaving like bored teenagers.

It's simply how we are when we're together, I told you that. And Envy's always like that.

Then do not say that I am the one always being difficult and antagonistic.

I'd amend that statement to I can be difficult as well. Even when I'm perfectly polite, you're...like you are.

[How to respond to this... It comes a few minutes later.]

Of course I am, if I am otherwise agitated. You're reading into everything too much.

I'm reading what's been put in front of me, nothing more. You're always agitated when I talk to you. What conclusions am I supposed to draw?

That is nothing more than a blatant exaggeration.

[HE SAYS AS HE PROCEEDS TO GET IRRITATED]

Then you always SEEM agitated. Or upset. Or somehow annoyed.

I thought I made it a point to you that I wouldn't be giving you trouble, and that is what I have tried to do. Yet you still seem convinced that my problem is with YOU.

You haven't given me any trouble. I'm just trying to understand WHAT the problem is. But I don't know how to talk to other people without somehow upsetting them.

I have just told you. I have no desire to be around your "people." I have said that I understand how things were at home. I had to get that explanation from someone else. But if I hadn't troubled you in some way, we would not be having this conversation.

You haven't, Scar. I'm just troubled.

And I am confused.

[And annoyed. And still trying to figure out what your deal is.]

One minute you tell me that I am being constantly antagonistic and now... whatever this is.

You're an antagonistic person. That's not an insult, it's just the sort of person you are. I'm not much different. I'm troubled in general by lots of things, not just you. But that doesn't mean you've done anything to purposefully upset me. It just is. I don't know how to talk people I don't have an uncomfortable history with, not without saying something that causes offense or distress. I certainly don't know how to do so with YOU.

Purposefully. Which still means that I clearly DO.

[Whether he tries to or not. Hell, even when he's ACTIVELY trying not to. Even he doesn't know where he's going with this.]

Edited 2014-07-23 17:43 (UTC)

It's resonance. You're a catalyst, that's all. I'm probably the same to you, aren't I? Like a tuning fork. It's not the fork's fault it vibrates and calls to those things inside the metal. Those things are always there, the fork just brings them forth and makes them raw.

[...What the hell are you even trying to say right now, woman?]

I have no idea what you are trying to tell me.

Don't you? We have the capacity to hurt and upset each other just by existing. Not because of anything we do but simply because of who and what we are. Things that can be buried in the mind come to light because of the reminders. That's all.

That makes more sense. What do we do about it, then?

I don't know.

IC contact

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